The dim glow of a nightclub bathroom, a shared lipstick shade, and the unspoken understanding that we’re all in this together – these are the moments that define female friendships. It’s like a modern-day version of the iconic jeans from ‘Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants,’ except our bond is sealed with a semi-matte pink liquid lipstick in the shade ‘Committed’ by The Balm. We’re a tight-knit group of four, each wearing the same shade, but somehow, it looks different on each of us, a testament to the magic of colour theory and the individuality of our skin tones.
As C.S. Lewis aptly wrote in his book ‘Four Loves,’ “Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one.’” This quote resonates deeply when I’m with my friends, prepping for a night out. Standing under the harsh bathroom lights, every pore magnified, we realize our insecurities are not unique. Vanity takes a backseat to vulnerability. Acne scars, sparse brows, and faint moustaches remain exposed, revealing our shared imperfections. In this space, candid conversations about our struggles flow effortlessly, strengthening the bonds between us.
It’s a haven of shared experiences, where a dermatologist friend suggests a ‘retinol sandwich’ for hyperpigmentation while another offers her new Le Correcteur De Chanel concealer, promising a porcelain-smooth complexion. The fourth member of our squad, battling post-shaving strawberry skin on her calves, vigorously exfoliates with a buff puff before we head out. “You don’t need to do all that,” we chime in, each offering our own brand of reassurance. After all, who among us hasn’t faced ingrown hairs or bumpy, uneven skin?
Friendship is a multifaceted concept, but for young, impressionable minds, it serves as a lens through which we understand the world. I entered the world of beauty a little late, a child who preferred Beyblade over Barbie. It was my ninth-grade school friend who introduced me to the hair straightener, a tool that remains a staple in my vanity today. Back then, we lacked the guidance of social media beauty gurus, so I learned by watching her clamp the iron onto damp hair, the sizzling sound of damage echoing through the room as she pulled her strands through the hot ceramic plates. It’s a memory we cringe at now, as we swap notes on the latest bond-strengthening treatments like K18, debating which moisturiser works better or which aesthetician’s advice to follow. But in recent years, we’ve realised that our differing needs require unique solutions.
A warm brown lipstick radiates a sunkissed glow against her olive skin, while the same shade on my fairer complexion turns me into a chalky TV serial villain. She’s self-conscious about her stretch marks, while I fixate on the pits in my cheeks. These distinct concerns highlight the individuality of our lived experiences. The differences in our skincare routines become gateways to understanding this fundamental truth, fostering greater empathy between us.
A UCLA study found that when women face stressful situations, they often seek support from each other – a strategy that has historically ensured the survival of women. Pop culture echoes this phenomenon. Remember the scene in ‘Mean Girls’ where Lindsay Lohan and the ‘plastics’ have a candid conversation about high school life while preparing for their winter talent show? Or in ‘Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara,’ when Kalki Koechlin’s character confides her apprehensions about her fiancé’s bachelor trip to her friends in the powder room? These moments showcase how beauty rituals create safe spaces for women to share advice and emotional support as they navigate life’s challenges.
Whether it’s a late-night conversation about a collagen-boosting face mask or a collective cringe over past beauty mishaps, these exchanges are woven into the fabric of female friendship, enriching it with shared experiences and mutual care. They remind us that even in our differences, we find connection, understanding, and a sense of belonging. These rituals are more than just beauty routines; they are a testament to the strength and enduring power of female friendships.